This is how I see the situation. Yes he may have went from doormat to extreme. But what is the suggestion for a middle ground? Often times the defensiveness comes in, because the forum tells us your letting her eat cake. And the next moment your trying to control her. But no one ever just helps you come up with actual ideas. Bigybiz is trying to come up with something that works for him. Because the encouragement on this forum is to focus on your happiness. And that is what he clearly is doing. The solution is for his W to stop passing up opportunities with her children to chase OM. Giving into her complaints is spoiling her to be honest IMHO.
