Limerence and My Situation 5

[AnotherStander]

Mark, I'm curious why you've been getting so defensive and argumentative lately, I get the sense you're not trying to convince us but perhaps yourself? Something to think about. You've really kind of been all over the place, for example:

You lack understanding of my situation.

We don’t live together – detachment
We don’t spend time together EXCEPT hand-overs - detachment

You're trying so hard to convince me/ us that you are detached, but then:

I’m NOT trying to convince anybody that I’m detached from my WW I DON’T WANT TO BE

You're not detached and don't want to be? I am not trying to call you out or shame you or anything of the sort, I am just saying slow down, take a deep breath, think about where you are (you personally, not your M), where you want to go and how to get there.

I'm sure you've seen this before, 25 posts it now and then but I think the guys around here that are in piecing can really relate to the truth in this:

Here are lines from Swingers that may help.

And what if I don't want to give up on
her?

ROB
You don't call.

MIKE
But you said I shouldn't call if I
wanted to give up on her.

ROB
Right.

MIKE
So I don't call either way.

ROB
Right.

MIKE
So what's the difference?

ROB
The only difference between giving up and
not giving up is if you take her back
when she wants to come back. See, you
can't do anything to make her want to
come back. You can only do things to
make her not want to come back.

MIKE
So the only difference is if I forget
about her or pretend to forget about her.

ROB
Right.

MIKE
Well that [censored].

ROB
It [censored].

MIKE
So it's almost a retroactive decision.
So I could, like, let's say, forget about
her and when she comes back make like I
just pretended to forget about her.

ROB
Right...or more likely the opposite.

MIKE
Right... Wait, what do you mean?

ROB
I mean first you'll pretend not to care,
not call - whatever, and then,
eventually, you really won't care.

MIKE
Unless she comes back first.

ROB
Ah, see, that's the thing. Somehow they
don't come back until you really don't
care anymore.

MIKE
There's the rub.

ROB
There's the rub.