Apparently I am a MNG based in the fact that I am willing to put my W ahead of my own needs.
I assume when you are calling yourself a MNG you are doing it in the context of the book NMMNG? If so then I'm wondering if you've read it, or understood what you read. Because the premise of the book is that NG's are NOT nice. They do NOT put others' needs before their own. They only pretend to put others' needs before their own to get what THEY want, and they do it in the sneakiest, most passive/aggressive ways possible.
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Found $100 bill a few months back. My first thought was what can W and I do with this money. It never occurred to me for a second to spend all that money on myself. That is the type of thing that makes me a MNG.
You are most definitely not understanding NGS. NGS would be "woah, 100 bucks, I'll tell W I'm going to take her out to dinner and then she'll HAVE to give me the sex I haven't had in weeks." Then when you don't get the sex you expect after the dinner, you mope around all evening and every time she asks what's wrong you say "nothing". Later she is putting dishes away and you yell at her for making too much noise, but you're really yelling at her because you are mad you didn't get sex. THAT is NGS. There's nothing good or nice about it, other than the fake "hey I'm just a nice guy!" facade.
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I have questioned my moral compass quite a bit in recent months. And after reading the MNG book, I feel that it might be time to step away from my moral compass a bit.
If you have NGS then your moral compass is all screwed up and needs to be reevaluated as part of the reform process.
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My moral compass is about taking care of others needs first and foremost.
Is it? Or is it to take care of others' needs because you want something? Are your motivations selfish or selfless? I'm not asking you to answer, just to dig deep and work through that. I did, and discovered some nasty truths about myself (that book was a real eye-opener). I'm mostly reformed from NGS but it's still a work in progress.
