Own - I know I am stuck in this cycle at the moment. It's crazy that I can't seem to control my emotions when I am around him that is why I think it is best that I stay away from him altogether until I can. He hasn't bothered to contact me anyway so it's academic whether I stay away or not.
Trouble is, is that although I am examining my life and the things I could change about myself I am literally working in the dark. I have no clue what drove him away because he won't tell me so I don't know what changes I am supposed to be showing him. If I look at the things he said to me at bomb drop then I need to give up gardening and start liking sport! He did say to me the last time I saw him that it is not necessarily anything I have done which I think is his way of getting me to stop asking him for reasons.
As for being in crisis. I don't know that he is. I think he just wants to be single and have no responsibilities. He seems content and happy enough at the moment and always looks so surprised that I am not accepting or playing along with his new life.
As for D. She wears her heart on her sleeve but she has never told him how she feels. I haven't discussed her feelings with him either. At one point a few months ago he said he was worried that she may not want to see him anymore and I just said give her time. She was not happy that I said this to him because she said that implies that she might want to see him in the future but infact she has made up her mind that she does not want to see him anymore.
This whole thing is even worse in that he refuses to communicate, even though he said he will try and commnunicate better, unless I reach out to him. It is just like I don't exist anymore and that hurts a lot.
Anyway, happy Thursday everyone!!
Me - 47 H - 45 D-16 M - 6 years Separated - May 16
Don't leave me behind can't you see me I'm shining... (Years & Years - 'Shine')
