The problem with many nice-guy type of H is that his idea of what a perfect H is......rarely is what a woman wants or really needs. With the Mr. Nice Guy mentality, the H tries to do everything so that his W doesn't need to lift a finger. He won't stand up for himself, even when she treats him badly. He thinks by not being decisive and letting her call all the shots will keep her in a better mood. Actually, these actions only cause her to feel a loss of attraction for you.
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The going dark thing is a reference to where members here simply leave their spouse unannounced for days or weeks. This shows the spouse that they are done with the marriage and gives the spouse a chance to miss them.
No, this is not how Going Dark works. IMHO, you can't really go dark when you have children together......and especially living under the same roof with her. Neither is the motivation of Going Dark is to cause the spouse to miss you. I think it would be to your advantage to increase Getting a Life without her.
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In my case, the kids need me home.
Then why would you consider leaving without notice and gone for days?
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My wife actually puts tge kids before everything,
Good, then you should be able to leave her in charge of them while you Get a Life.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
