Thanks for all of your suggestions and encouragement. Yes, this has been a rough week, one of the tougher ones of this journey but knowing I am not alone really does help.
Journaling:
W gave me a rare call at work which I pickup because she usually only does that if there is something urgent with the kids. She just called to chat and say hi. I was friendly but kept it short.
We had the hopefully final round of d negotiation. I was anxious but two friends IRL helped me prepare. One asked what are you afraid of? That was a great question. The other helped me prioritize goals. In the end I got what was most important and traded off some points that were important to her. Like a good negotiation, neither party got all of what they wanted but it’s fair enough for both of us to sign.
Side points:
W fluctuated between friendly and mean and teary and touchy. W started gaslighting in the middle and I stayed calm and said I would not address these accusations. She said they’re not accusations. They’re facts. But I refused to get side tracked.
W kept gushing about OM2 and how much she wants me to meet him and how we will all be friends. W said i won’t be paying alimony for long because she is going to get remarried soon. Amazing how she has already moved from OM1 to OM2 and she’s already talking remarriage.
W said she knows how hard this is for me and I want you to know that I really do love you and that I am here for you if you want to talk. She kept saying I want us to be friends.
Gordie 40s W 40s M20+ kids 2016 BD W fantasy affair w OM1 I do everything wrong 2017 I start to DB W says TLTL files for D PA w OM2 2018 I do LRT W drops filing and OM2 situation slowly improving
