still struggling

[25yearsmlc]

calmly protecting interests, doing nothing in a punitive manner,

is what you can do. It won't eliminate hard feelings but it will help reduce them.

Example: My h canceled the car insurance on my car, without notice. And canceled our d's coverage too. Given the disparity in income, I thought it was petty.
But I was more irritated that he gave me and our d's no warning. They called me. Cowardly.

I tried to defend him in my head, thinking "well, my car isn't even here yet, but..." It still struck me as cheap and selfish, with a side dish of wimpy for not telling me.

Then He canceled life insurance we had on him from when he deployed, which I was paying for, so it cost him nothing for me/the kids to have it.

For me, this^^ was such a vindictive, petty & cruel act, that there was no explanation other than something that reflected very poorly on him. His L said h believed he'd been paying but that's a lie I can prove (Insurance company took notes of the conversation and h was "informed wife was paying all premiums"). Who does that?



He could have changed the sole beneficiary to our kids (b/c God forbid I get something after 35 years of schlepping around the world for him). We are a continent apart so it's not as if he can pretend to be afraid of me??

Hey guys, I know It's not WWIII, but i probably won't ever see my h in the same way.

Does this help?