I've been reading along and staying off on the sidelines because others have given you excellent advice.
I want to point something out to you that you may not even be aware. I think your h made mention again that he feels that you are expecting something from him. Coly, even though you think you are just meeting up w/him for tea or coffee, your body language is sending off vibes that you are expecting him to say he wants to come home and reconcile. Body language, especially the eyes, tend to say something different than our words. People in MLC have an uncanny sense of detecting things about us, our moods and yes body language.
I do agree w/bttrfly, you can come from a place of loving kindness, but you've got to fake it to make it for a while. Eventually, the faking will become the genuine "can't be arssed" attitude.
Your expectations are still up the scale a bit and you've got to lower them...do not "expect or want him to help you. If he does something on his own, thank him. But, when it comes to the bottom line, should him that you are a confident woman who can take care of herself and not have to expect or ask him to help you. Something breaks, ring up someone else.
Coly, time to pull out the actress costume and start playing the role of a confident, self-assured woman. The nominations are coming in for the best actress role and I want to see you on that list.
Take care.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
