Glad to hear from you. I know that it's only words but your H consistently says stuff indicating not shutting you out. Almost as often he let's you know that you are pushing him (meaning pushing him away). I honestly don't think that he is fully lost to you, but forcing reconnection will not work.

Maybe he needs to feel and believe this "couldn't be arssed" attitude more. Stop expecting hoping or wanting him to help.

Best wishes

R 25 years
M 14 years
S11 & S13
Working on it alone since Oct 2014
M in trouble a lot earlier (~2 years)
Feb 2016. 1st R chat in a yr.
Next R chat Aug'17
Still together