"I will never have to explain to my kids why I filed for divorce and can look my kids in the eye and say "dad made some mistakes in life, but dad did everything he could do to keep this family together."
^^^^^^ This means a lot to me.
I think you can make it until after Christmas can't you?
My counselor once told me that if a separation goes past 6 months the likely hood of divorce increases significantly.
Yes...I can make it. I could longer but like you said earlier I don't want to try to keep someone in my life that doesn't want to be in it. My value is to great. Outside of not finding another female companion I am good right now (but I know that will get old). I am enjoying doing my thing, having some alone time etc.
It is about the family for me as you stated. It means a lot to me for my D's to know that daddy never gave up.
To be honest, I don't understand this 'giving up' thing that the LBS's hang on to. I am asking sincerely, not trying to be rude.
How is it that you gave up when the other person just destroyed it all in one go? You can't do $hit if the other person has no desire to work on the MR, no matter how many gold medals you get in DB olympics. So, why does filing for D 'giving up'. Wouldn't the kids learn when they're older that the WAS/WW is the one who gave up?
I am just struggling with this concept because it seems unfair to the LBS - as if all the burden is on us to figure out a way.
LOL....well she is a female I get what your saying, makes sense!
What up M......The way I view giving up might not be actually giving up vs standing for the MR. When I think of my kids, I know they would rather have their family back together in a loving, functional relationship. If they had a vote I know what their vote would be. So for me if I have to go through some pain to make their vote be heard then I will do it.
There is 1 person in the relationship already making a selfish decision.....there doesn't need to be 2.
All my friends are in at best par to sub par marriages but 1 and he is clinically depressed due to his job.
I look at it this way, I am way ahead of the game because I will either be single and happy just casually dating, get into a really great relationship with another woman, or a my W wakes up one day and says WTF did I do and does all the hard work and we get back together.
Either way I have my kids, my family, my friends, my health, a great job. I really can't go wrong.
Last edited by Cadet; 10/20/1710:40 PM. Reason: Start a new thread message
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