Well week one is over of the new me and here are some updates...
I have kept my distance giving WAW some space as she requested...Here is what i have noticed from her since I began. She is very pleasant when we do meet, and seems really interested in letting me know all the details of what she is doing, of course not talking about OM, but do I really want to know anyway??? She even invited me in for coffee when I dropped d3 off yesterday, quite a turn in events form 2 weeks ago when she told me to get out of her house as she didn't want me there anyway. Also showed me something that needed fixing in her home, and asked if I could get the tools and fix it for her...To some may not be much but I see these as baby steps for sure.
As for me, keeping busy, exercising more, eating better, resting and being super dad. Not waiting by the phone anymore, just doing what comes naturally and going with it, its kinda nice having some freedom to myself.
I am going to keep this up, as these baby steps are nice to see and to monitor. Are these the type of steps I should be encouraged about? Or am I looking too much for some positive reactions from her?
I am slower but surely ridding myself on the anger I have inside, I have seen a change in my attitude and even a friend commented on it, was asking why I was so cheery, mentioned that I have let go of the anger I had and it feels good, my friends have noticed me smiling more as well.
So the past week as I said was the start of new beginnings and things seem to be better for myself. I keep conversations light with WAW, just small talk anf talk about our d, no mention of the big D yet or anything like that. I also got a thank you from her not too long ago which was a change, I had cut some lilacs from my backyard and offered her some for her house, she accepted and thanked me for them, very good news, and even displayed them inher living room for everyone to see who comes over and made a point to let me know she had.
SO allthese little things ave transpired as I remain somewhat inthe dark, not really though, just giving her room to breath and take everything in. Hopefully the feelings she once had for me will return, but I know I;m a long way away form that but all these posotives make it all seem possible again. Again no talk about us, she knows and I am backing off how I feel, i also try to make conversation about her, to see what she is interested in and what makes her go these days, maybe find some new common ground for us to start at. Any ideas on that philosophy?
Please friends, some insight, comments, opinions, they all help and making this long journey bearable....
