I'm new here and someone recommended I read your threads. I haven't read them all yet but I can see the similarities in our situations. My husband and I are in our late 30's, my husband is from the Middle East, started out as a good religious man, and then started having affairs and just left for the second time. We have one daughter that my husband has never helped to care for except for starting to take her out for two hours several times per week for two weeks now after I made him sign an informal separation agreement. My husband is also a physician (I think I saw that yours is) and had one serious relationship with a nurse at work among others.
One of your posts sounded particularly familiar - when your husband wanted to take a nap before taking you to the hospital. My husband did the same thing when I was about to have our daughter!
I'm American but have lived in the Middle East as well as traveled in South and Central Asia so I know the culture(s) of those regions. Most of my friends are from that part of the world and all I can say is that situations like ours aren't all that unique. The only difference may be that women in our situations have more options because we live here in the US. Also we may be less likely to involve our families right from the beginning which ultimately probably empowers our husbands because they don't need to worry about the wrath of their parents.
Maybe I'm off target because I haven't read all your posts but I just wanted to say hi and it sounds like we're in the same boat!
