Well, she does need a professional counselor. Although, she might get one that is not pro M. Has she considered seeing a doctor for AD's and maybe sleeping meds?

Quote:
I will keep my eyes open for her actions. I understand what you are saying. She needs to show me she wants to be in this marriage


Are you sure you understand? I feel as if I'm not communicating well. Don't get distracted by one area (actions, words, or attitude). Observe to see if all three are lining up together that is letting you know she sincerely wants this M to work. I believe when all three consistently line up side by side with the same message, then you won't have reason to feel confused.

Has she told you she wants the M to be better or even if she wants to save it? Has she indicated remorse for the destruction her affair has caused her loved one? I don't mean just shedding a few tears, but has she made it clear to you that she is sorry for betraying you and that she through with OM? Perhaps I misunderstood, but I thought you told her to end it or get out. And.....then you start getting these mixed signals?

You posted on GW's thread that she told you she resented you and no longer respected you. At what point did she say this? And, has she said what you would need to do to change it? I ask b\c I believe it was yesterday I wrote somewhere that I have yet to see a WW be that clear with her H about the root problem. So, I am interested in knowing more.

It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!