Trust me I personally know it's tough, but until you are willing to file for divorce. W behavior will not change. She will continue to have struggle with the bills the support the family. And she will continue to focus on OM. My W was doing the same to me until I realized that she was going to do more than just hurt R wise. My future was a stake. And you seem to be in a far worse financial situation than myself. W is seriously cake eating without the risk of losing anything.
