Living in limbo and hating it

[Painful]

ANNIVERSARY QUESTION.

Hi All - I'd imagine this question has been answered in some threads before but I haven't seen it. So the question for all the vets as well as newbies going thru theses hard times right now. WHAT DO WE DO REGARDING OUR ANNIVERSARIES? Mine is tomorrow so would greatly appreciate opinions.

In the years past (except for last year when things started to unravel) my WW and I celebrated the date by going out to fancy expensive restaurants with continuing "partying" in the BDR. On one hand I completely understand that she no longer feels emotionally or physically connected with me and our M as we knew it is dead (even though we're still legally married and there's no talk of a D). OTOH, it's still her history and certainly a pleasant one no matter the current M condition. Right now we're civil in a cold way and have a very limited contact at daughter exchanges. I'd like to acknowledge the anniversary in some way -- is it being weak and in denial of the current sitch OR does it show strength and character that shows I am willing to rise above the craziness of today? I'm positive she still remembers that day as the one of the best in her life - wouldn't it be worth it to remind her of the happy days in our M to possibly lessen her resentment and rebellion and crack the R door ever so slightly? Or will it have the opposite effect?

I really can't make up my mind and keep going back and forth with pros and cons of each side. I'm ready for either 2X4s if you need to send some or an encouragement to make some move. If anyone is in favor of acknowledging it, how would you suggest I handle it?