Well, if she felt entitled to start an affair, she didn't feel the same way you did. That was just an example scenario. Or are you claiming that you were the model husband to her, yet she chose to start an affair? I don't think so as you talk about habitual hibernation. Bottom line is that when an affair happens, some want was not fulfilled (and she chose to disregard the healthy marriage boundaries).
It sounds quite frightening that you "chose not to cross the line". If you are happily married, crossing the line isn't even something that visits your mind.
I'm not trying to mock you or anything.
In my thirties, BDd 2017, divorced 2 young kids new relationship
