I think the hospital incident would have been a good opportunity for you to 180.
Your future partner would benefit from an Lcause who can be supportive of those in need and who places his kids' needs in a somewhat scary situation over his own plans.
Some posters need help pushing back against spouses who are constantly taking from the LBS. Others need help learning to step up.
It can cause problems when people take the wrong advice.
Me: 44 H: 44 Kids: 20, 16, 16, and 10 Together/Married: 22 years H announced he was emotionally detached and considering D: 4/4/16 H announced he is going to try to stay and reconnect: 5/1/16