So If I chose to mess around with a few of my W friends and family who I know would be willing. Yes, they are that trifling. That would be okay due to it being about me and not her? I assumed there was a certain level of decency, considering that she claimed to want things to be cordial. But from what I am learning there are no boundaries. So just do what makes me feel good?
I think what Kaizen is saying is "forget how she's acting, YOU need to act in a way that supports meeting your goals and teaches your son the lessons he should learn." All you can control here is YOU. How SHE behaves should not impact how YOU behave.
Revenge isn't going to support your goals. It might make you feel better (but more likely it will make you feel WORSE!) but it's not going to bring her back, and it's not going to "show her" anything. It's going to show YOU something, and your friends and family something, and your child something. Is that what you want them to see?
Look, I get how angry you are. I also get how badly you're hurting. I know you think that SHE deserves to have SOME kind of consequence for what she's done and what she's doing. But you NEED to figure out how to let that crap go. As long as you hold on to that, you'll be trapped where you are now. As long as you hold on that, you'll be making yourself a worse person instead of a better one. As long as you hold on to that, you'll just hurt MORE and not less.
And here's another one: the longer you let these thoughts and behaviors on your part continue, the more you've allowed her to affect your life.
