Pursuit comes from HER she comes to me NOT the other way around the confusion I get from these boards happens at that point! I don’t stonewall her or give her the cold shoulder but show her a confident, cool, calm and classy (4 C’s) individual who’s moving on with his life. Always smiling always happy BUT always willing to listen and validate.
I understand, I wasn't suggesting that you were pursuing, I honestly don't get that impression from your posts at all. I was simply explaining why pursuit FEELS right but ISN'T right From what I can tell it sounds to me like you are doing quite well with DB'ing.
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AS you mention your brother’s wife was involved in an A and has been for a long while can I ask whether your brother is now in a stable R? I ask because as you’ll know statistically the WS do regret their choices especially when the BS has moved onto another. By this time it’s too late to RC and they then fall back to their original AP/LO or onto another, wash rinse repeat...!
No, as a matter of fact he has not so much as gone out on a date since BD, S and D. From what he's told me (mainly what he hears from their kids) she certainly doesn't sound happy in her R, but that never equated into her reaching out to recon. Maybe she's just that madly in love with OM, or maybe she's just too proud and stubborn to admit she made a bad choice. Most of the time we never do find out what's in their head.
From what I can tell it sounds to me like you are doing quite well with DB'ing.
