I don't know your entire history. But just reading your last post says so much about many of these walkaways. There is just something deeper going on within them and eventually they seem to crack. We come on here thinking its about us, and it usually isn't. Sadly it seems to take years for it to reveal itself (I know your way past that though)
Sorry you are going through this. I regret what a F up my ex is as well. Especially when I compare him to other dads and other families that do not have the same struggles. I try to remind myself that most people have some sort of struggle though and all we can do is play the hand we are dealt.
BTW There is also a great guided meditation app you can get called calm.com. I love how its organized and They have lots of stuff on there for kids, even little ones. My therapist recommended it to me.
