So, when we were in court, the judge said "go to mediation" and in the interim, we should continue to follow the status quo (which was the parenting plan we'd previously agreed to). XW asked the judge to give her that Sunday, and the judge said "talk to him about it." I had no problem with her having that Sunday, and I wanted to take D to the company picnic at the zoo, so we traded.
Now she says she wants EVERY Sunday (I get four of those every three months). I say I'm not giving up weekend time, I don't GET a lot of it as it is, so she proposes that I could get her for four hours on a Friday and she'll get her for four hours on Sunday every weekend I have her. I don't like this. It means I never, EVER get a full weekend, I have to run around a lot to make it happen (for the trade we did, I met her halfway for her day. On the zoo day, she made me drive an extra 15 miles each way for pickup AND drop off). At the same time, I'm sympathetic to her going two weeks without seeing D.
Of course, she CAN see her in the interim (during the week) she just usually chooses not to. And she doesn't spend the time she HAS with her. I've been told by three people now (all of them related to XW in some way and not me) that XMIL takes care of D while she's with XW, and not XW. So why am I worried about this? The judge DID tell us to be flexible but he didn't tell me to be a doormat.
XW wanted to get D after school yesterday. She's allowed to under the plan (I put in there that she could see her EVERY day after school, she just has to give me 24 hours notice). She made plans with D on Monday, but never bothered to talk to me about it. Yesterday on the way to school, she confirmed those plans with D. I sent her a text saying to remember that she's supposed to give let me know the day before, and asking what time she was picking up/dropping off. She stated she did on Monday. I asked her to put it in text, so all three of us can be on the same page. Her response was, "too many rules with you. So, what, I can't have her now?" I said of course she could have her, and the drama starts. "That's fine, I won't get her" stuff like that. It's like dealing with a child. All I'm trying to figure out is "what time are you picking her up, and what time are you dropping her off" and she's just picking fights. I'm disgusted.
It also seems that XW is looking at mediation as some kind of weapon, so I think cadence hit the nail on the head as to what she's going to try to do. Thanks for that cadence. Id you hadn't posted that, I'd probably be wondering what the heck she could possible be thinking.
