Hey Blu.....thanks for hitting up my thread! I love reading your posts!
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This is a hard question! My first question would be, without over analyzing it, what does your gut instinct tell you? Do you feel taken advantage of?
My gut instinct tells me "no". I know it was hard as h$ll for her to come to me and ask for money. Every time I have given her money she has cried or has fought back tears. I have been very careful to not ask her why she went over budget or make her feel bad for not spending her money properly. I have always handled our finances so she is not used to having to stick to a budget. I don't offer to give her money but when she asks it is hard for me to say "no" because I know she doesn't want to aask. I just don't want her to think i am push over, nice guy, that big daddy will be their to bail me out. It's just not that simple IMO.
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I really liked reading that bit you put in there written by the WAW and her perspective. It makes sense.
Thanks...I found it from a post about 10 yrs ago and it really made sense to me. I have always tried to look at my W and what she is doing objectively. She is trying to be independant and wants to take this journey. I think the LBS often makes excuses for how the other person felt. I am not made at her for her feelings if anything I am mad at her for how she handled it. I think if more LBS's looked at their sitch objectively and not take things so personally they might heal a lot quicker.
I know this was hard for my W....I saw the pain on her face and we cried together as a family. Right or wrong her desire to this journey was more important at this time than our family. I don't like the decsion but I have to respect it.
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If there is something I would like to see you add to your list on the first post in this thread it would be that each of your leading examples be so that you can be a better man and so that you can be a strong role model for your children.
Definately true and I agree 100%....the only thing that currently brings tears to my eye are my 2 daughters. I am tearing up actually as I type this. If it wasn't for them I would already be out. If my W has a journey she needs to take then someone has to be responsible for our family and look out for my D's. If that means I go through some strife for the potential to keep our family together then it is worth it to me.
I just don't know how long to wait......GAL, detach, whatever....in the end we are all waiting or we would file for D ourselves.
That is what I get the most confused on because it seems like the LBS' that were successful ended up filing themselves.
