Infidelity/WAH, my story pt 10

[PsySara]

WH continues to phone in parenthood. He'll play with the kids for a bit each day then goes to his man cave and plays video games while I do all the dinner,homework, bath routines. I've seen a few more lawyers and at this point will be going with the second lawyer I saw. I like her philosophy and she is willing to put the brakes on at any time I tell her. But frankly I don't see WH really caring.

Last night one of the pups got ill and I had to be taken to the vet, she's still there and may need surgery tomorrow. I came home after a hectic day and started the evening routine. WH came to me asked if it would be possible for all of us to go to Disney water park, I mulled it over and said sure. Then I realized that we may have a pup recovering from surgery so I am unsure if this will be do-able. I also remembered that I have the kids signed up for Islamic studies every Sunday. Wh just wanted us to stay overnight Friday and come home Saturday night. If pup just needs hydration this will be possible.

I can't help but be weirded out that we're still doing things as a family while I am planning my divorce. WH is barely talking to me and I find I am fine with that. It's a relief honestly, not to worry about what he is thinking or saying. I find myself not giving a crap if I piss him off or bruised his crystalline brittle ego. I am so mentally exhausted from the last two years and WH's complete inertia with regards to reconciliation that I have lost all motivation to work towards our marriage. I still get very angry when I go over the lies, the omissions, the blame shifting. I am angry he chose to throw away diamonds for a piece of petrified sh*t. There is no doubt in my mind he will deeply regret his wayward ways but I think that will be after years of being alone (or shallowly partnered) and the kids eventually seeing him for what he is, dishonest and narcissistic. Sorry guys, not in a very positive mood tonight. This whole thing has made me jaded and realize my idea of soulmates is just a stupid fantasy.