As a former JAG Corps officer in the Army, I am not a big fan of civilians reporting soldiers for having A's with their spouses.
For one thing, it's often just not true. I've seen allegations tossed out by angry spouses who are divorcing. And commanders don't feel like spending a lot of resources investigating what is seen as mostly a domestic issue.
It is exceedingly rare for the military to press charges for A, without some other underlying problem like theft.
Usually the A would have to directly interfere with the soldier's job performance, in which case that is the military's focus, not the A itself.
The military view of an affair stems from fears of it interfering with the moral, welfare, and discipline of the unit.
(See Code of Military Justice, Article 34).
For instance with fraternization (officers with enlisted or senior enlisted with junior)
or, if the OM is having an A with another solider's wife, particularly one in his own unit or for whom he is the supervisor. Or with a married soldier in his unit. Or if he is an officer & is with the wife of an enlisted man, then that is the primary military focus.
Anyone remember Lietuenant Kelly the first female B-1 bomber pilot who had an A with the h of an enlisted women?
She got a General Discharge and that is effectively the same as an honorable one in terms of VA benefits, home loans, etc. A few jobs that require an honorable discharge might not hire her, but that's it.
And that was a VERY Public event and that was the reason it was pursued at all. (It irked me b/c I was a female officer, so thanks for making it harder for all of us, LT. kelly).
A President of the USA - (our former commander in chief) - suffered no criminal charges related to his A either. It's how it is now. The idea that an officer was necessarily a gentleman, obviously did not apply then.
For me, the real question is why would you do this? What is your goal in hurting his career? You think hurting his military career IF IT IS POSSIBLE, which I doubt, helps your see you in a better light?
How do you think that choice will be seen down the road by your w AND by others?
For all we know, he served in combat & helped saved lives. They may be leaders and yes, even though they had an A, they may lead soldiers who are willing to kill & die for them.
I just don't think the commanders are fazed by these types of claims, absent other factors herein included.
Plus, veterans get better pay in the civilian world & do not face deployments.Be careful what you wish for.
I am very sorry for your situation. But i think the DB tenets still apply.
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
25YRSMLC........I don't think your reply was to me, but just in case anyone thinks I am in favor of reporting the OM, I am not. I was confused by some of the posts and thought he had already reported the OM.
There have been very few situations that I would suggest exposure, and this is not one of them.
I tend to post more to LBH newcomers, so I am not sure if exposure is more of the male thinking, or not. The men see OM as being the problem. Remove the problem and he gets his W back, right? But it does not remove the problem. The problem started before OM entered the picture.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
I tend to post more to LBH newcomers, so I am not sure if exposure is more of the male thinking, or not. The men see OM as being the problem. Remove the problem and he gets his W back, right? But it does not remove the problem. The problem started before OM entered the picture.
I think most of us guys know that the OM is a symptom and not the root cause of the problem. But, it's nice to be able to deflect a lot of the anger and rage toward the OM rather than the loving wife.
A guy thing is pissing off of a bridge so you can watch the pee hit the water below. Or farting in an elevator just before getting off the elevator. Or putting fake barf on the conference room table just before a big meeting.
Speaking as a man. Even though I know the issues were there before OM came in the picture. But I realize that nothing we do will make a difference until OM is out of the picture. So yes finding ways to get rid of OM tends to become apart if the plan. Then when he gone we can proceed to win W back with our changes.
Speaking as a man. Even though I know the issues were there before OM came in the picture. But I realize that nothing we do will make a difference until OM is out of the picture. So yes finding ways to get rid of OM tends to become apart if the plan. Then when he gone we can proceed to win W back with our changes.
Tread,
Yeah bro!!! You're spot-on.
And you have to admit, despite societal norms, we all just want to kick the OM's @ss real good and then go have a beer.
