So play this out. I always try to think like 2 or 3 steps ahead and look for potential outcomes. You say "sorry I need you home by 4, I got plans". She says "sorry not going to happen I am taking this client". What is your next move??
Man that's a hard question. If she responded that way I'm sure my impulse would be to get angry, which certainly wouldn't help things. But what IS the appropriate response? I could validate until the cows come home but if she still refuses to come home, then what?
When there is no pattern, perhaps this^^^^ is a whole lot of overthinking and borrowing trouble from the future.
What exactly do you fear? Is it that you don't think you can establish boundaries without looking like a jerk?
(A lot of us face that challenge) but that's on us, not our partner.
"Im sorry I cant watch them tonight"
I dont understand why more than that is needed. Theres a plan and you agreed to it with her. this^^^
Doing anything outside of that is her asking you for a favor which you dont HAVE to agree to.
Why not just cross that bridge when you get to it?
In the past, Did you have a problem establishing clear boundaries and then resenting your w when she crossed a line - she did not know of?
If so, That'd be a good thing to work on for yourself, correct?
Thumbs up for that.
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
