Any Advice?

[gw5263]

She has this narrative she sticks to about emotionally separating from me before talking to OM, which i dont buy. She never changed the way she acted towards me until I discovered her dirty little secret. She knew him from High School and claims that one night she saw he was on FB and started to tell him our issues, and he worked his magic. Yes, i was weak in my handling it. I didnt know what to do. I appeased, I begged, I cried, I yelled. Had no idea what i was dealing with and no help. Now i know better. I am learning to do as everyone has said. She told me that all the fighting for us and asking for chances was pushing her farther away. Today she told me that all the effort i attempted to put in to save us actually drove her way past the point of working on us. She forgets that i saw her texts to OM before the Separation telling him she wanted a life with him and not me. I realize now what Sandi said. She needs to be dumped, not me. How can i go about this while living in the same house?We have 2 kids if that matters. This A is strange to me because they have seen each other physically 2 times. Everything else is calls, facetime, and texts due to distance, and i cant understand how she expects it to last and be forever. How can she possibly have fallen in love and decided he is her soulmate over a phone? I realize he says everything she wants to hear and makes her feel great with his comments. But ithink most everyone would agree that physical contact would be important too. And they have none. When she told me she wanted to be with him, i told her to leave and go be with him and she refused, saying she didnt want to leave the kids. Im so confused by all this. She acts most of the time like nothing has ever happened, like it was 9 months ago. But if i bring it up she gets belligerant or cries, or shuts down and says nothing.