Do you like being threaten? Because thats what you W is doing to you. If she wants to be with him, then she has to except the consquences. He's in the military and having affair is punishable under UMCJ. If she will hate you after, how does she feel about now, because is show don't sound like she likes you. IMO you need to air it out. Tell his command and let them both deal with the consquences. Don't protect her relationship with OM.

Also to me it sounds like she is saying I dare you. You need say "Dare excepted". She's still married to you.

After you do it. Dont react to nothing she does and GAL hard.

M:37 W:37
T:11 M:10
S17, S13, S10, S4
BD:06/28/17
OM confirmed 07/20/17
Recon the M 10/29/17
Working hard:2gether

Onward and forward

This process is not a sprint it's a marathon! Patience, Patience, Patience.