MLC or WAS... either way, I'm here

[LAJar]

Welcome to the board. There are a lot of good caring people here. Congratulations on taking that step to improve things.

Thank you roist. In my short time here, I have definitely seen and felt the caring. It is much appreciated!

I would move sooner rather than later in regards to finances. Protect yourself. Move forward with the idea thath will give no money until a separation agreement is in place and he has to. Maybe he will but best be ready.

H paid the mortgage for one month after he left, but it's the 2nd month and nothing. I don't believe he will go for a separation agreement. It's D or nothing for him, even though he's yet to serve me. The reason I blocked his text is because he only texted to offer settlement #'s, which he's pulling out of the air. I refused to discuss w/ him until I consulted w/ a L. I have twice and will be speaking w/ a 3rd next week. I believe he wants me to agree to a # and not go through a L - not happening.

The OW is not the problem but until she is gone things cannot improve.TThat has to happen naturally. You cannot speed it up. That is a long conversation but you can find it in threads here.

OW is not the problem - easier said than lived. Ultimately, in the deepest part of my brain, I know this though. It is beyond hurtful and I tell myself the odds of it lasting aren't great. Whether right or wrong, at this point in time, it is a small consolation.

This process is slow,so knuckle down for a long haul. Forget about H for now. Focus on taking care of you. Until you are in a good place other stuff cannot be worked on

. I am working on this with IC, trying to GAL (gym, being w/ family and friends). I just realize this time of year is going to be difficult w/ 10 year anniversary next week, son's bday (why does OW share this date?) & my bday next month, and then the holidays. It's a mountain for sure.

Best wishes