Any Advice?

[LiM]

GW,

I was also guilty of emotional neglect and not paying enough attention to my W. But while she is in an A, she can not see or appreciate any changes you make. The a has to die first. In the interim, you need to make changes for YOU. When the A does die, she will then be able to look back and begin to appreciate all the changes you made.

While exposing the A to his superiors might make you feel better and ruin his career, I don't think it will do anything but push your W further away. She will be VERY angry at you and she might not be able to get past that. What you can do is let her go down her own path that she created for herself. From what you describe, this guy is a total loser. She's got to see that for herself. You can't make her see that. She's got to discover it for herself. When she comes out of the fog, she will be ashamed that she allowed herself to become connected with such a loser.

Let her go. Let her sit in the mess she is creating. Spend this time working on you.