Not sure if I should regret this action or not. But after the poem to OM and trying to clean out the house incident. I told W that due to her actions, she was officially done with her and she was nothing to me. Well aware that was harsh and some might say that drove her further to OM. But at that point this woman had disrespected me at every turn. And it seemed that OM or whatever other man she is dealing with already had her. The fear of her running to another man wasn't there, because at that point she was already messing around.
She mentioned that I said a lot of stuff to her, which she was clearly bothered by. But at this point, I don't care about her feelings. Every time I show an ounce of weakness and concern for W, I get kicked in the teeth. My only concern is S13 and myself, because clearly she is stuck in this fantasy where bills and financial obligations mean nothing. Where I am left to decide on what to do with this home and everything in it. So I probably shouldn't have said what I said to W.
But it was true and at the end of the day, I probably needed to say that in order to move on with my life. Right now, I need to come up with a brand new plan for my future without W. And that's going to be partially determined on what I do with this house. I know that we are not supposed to make decision while in an emotional state. But I really don't have time at this point for things to settle down. I meet with this lawyer tomorrow and will likely go ahead and file for divorce. Once lawyers get involved, then W will have no choice bu t to handle business.
Not sure if I should regret this action or not. But after the poem to OM and trying to clean out the house incident. I told W that due to her actions, she was officially done with her and she was nothing to me. Well aware that was harsh and some might say that drove her further to OM.
Is this something you've been thinking about a long time or did it just kind of come out of nowhere? How did you feel afterwards, relieved or upset or something else?
Quote:
But it was true and at the end of the day, I probably needed to say that in order to move on with my life.
Sometimes that's what it takes. That's really kind of what TXHubby did, and for the same reason- to save himself. In his case it brought his W out of the fog, but there's no guarantees that will happen so doing something like this has to be done for yourself, not as a trick to save the M. And it sounds like you are doing it for you, and that is OK.
It came out of nowhere. But it had been building up for a long time. When I said what I did. I had finally just accepted that everything good and decent about mtvW was gone. It was literally like talking to someone I can't stand to look at. I felt upset, but also just done with this whole thing. There was just this feeling of not being able to think of one reason to be with her.
I am currently at the best I have been in a decades physically. And she is at her worst treating me like I am nothing. Mentally I am at my best. And W mentally is a damn wreck. And yet judging me. At that moment there was nothing attractive about physically or mentally. W just came off extremely fake with her b.s. motivational FB post as well. I don't deal with people like this period. So why do I want a W who displays this type of behavior.
Alright, I am wondering how to respond to W. Normally my W emails me newsletters from her job. Normally she'll do so when she sees article that my help me out in some way. Haven't received one in awhile and Didn't expect anything since things are crazy between us.
So this morning I received an email with this newsletter. Not trying to look deep into it. But why suddenly out of nowhere I get this. Also a mutual friend of ours brought up that W still had picture la if he at work. Including a wedding photo. Once trying not to look deep into this. For all I know she might be acting like everything is great for her coworkers.
My plan was to pay the lawyer tomorrow to get the ball rolling in this divorce. But now in the last day, I seem to be getting these signs not to throw in the towel just yet. But that could just be me looking for an excuse not to go through with it.
At this point, I have no choice but to get a lawyer involved. Everyone I know is telling me that your W is out to ruin you. And will do so if you don't do something now. Sad part is that they are right. Still hoping that there is a possibility to work things out. But at this point, I am fed up and need to seriously look out for myself and S13.
Right now I am wondering if I should reply to the email she sent with a simple thank you. Or just remain silents. For all I know she could be temp checking to see if I am truly done with her. So me being cordial and thanking her may have her thinking that she still has me. But no response might be a bad move, because I read on this board that LBS ignoring their spouses is not a good idea.
Just a quick moral question. W AND SIL who supports the A are having a sibling trip in Orlando for four days starting tomorrow. ON lives in VS, but travels to Florida once a month for work. My guess is that W plans on meeting with him on this trip. So do I have somewhat of a moral obligation to inform W of the possibility of them meeting up?
