25yearsMLC 10 Years Later I FILE D part 6

[Maybell]

You don't have to do it all at once, which is a relief since you CAN'T do it all at once.

But if you clear up your place you'll feel more accomplished and have more energy to take on the harder tasks.

I have no input about contacting your H directly. I don't know if there's anything you can do to change his attitude. You don't know who's feeding the "hates your guts" attitude or why he claims to feel that way. And it's irrelevant to the BUSINESS PROCESS of divorce anyway.

I do know that my ex felt like I "fought so bitterly" for the settlement I ultimately got as a way of punishing him for how he left the marriage. That is not true at all. I need every penny of support I get from him, and then some. The kids' lifestyle and schools changed even with the generous agreement he signed, as much as I tried to preserve it. He's angry with me for wanting him to continue to provide for us even if it meant he got to shag whoever he pleases. That's his problem. My trying to "park bench" a solution would have provided him an opportunity to manipulate me, since I'm not so good at manipulating him. You're too angry to fake an appeal to his better self. It may be better to try to relax into the process and get some indication from your L of what teeth she intends to sink into the proposal that will truly bind him to act.

I have confidence in you, 25. You have worth and you are going to be OK. The thing you're most afraid of is the unknown at this point. Once things are known, you'll know how to proceed. Try to remember that.

(((((25)))))