Lost on how to save my marriage! 2

[25yearsmlc]

I'm thinking about dropping the D papers. I'm feeling disrespected and taken for granted.

I'm a little lost on how to navigate this situation from here.

Joejoe

I read over your thread and seems to me you have not been here very long (by DB standards. I know it feels like a century for you).


I see that many of the things you have done so far are about getting a reaction from your w. That's not going to help and it's actually pretty manipulative. And usually it's obvious to the WAS who sees it as more pressure from you.

Do not file for divorce to get a reaction. It's like marital Russian roulette.

There are ways to move forward and let her do the work for a divorce if that is what she wants.

How are your GAL activities? (San Antonio has a lot of GAL possibilities. We lived there 7 years and it's a great place for families). Part of GAL is to distract you from constantly obsessing and part of it is to help you grow as a man. And to help you with GAL.

Maybe you can let go of the need for certainty now, until you are more consistent.

Can you tell us what specific changes you are working on that you yourself wanted to work on?

I'm hazy on ^^that, and I'm also hazy on whether your w is merely writing to her old bf or actively seeing him, etc. Do you know? What prior relationship with OW is your w referring to? Was that resolved?

And you guys have 4 sons in the house, 2 of whom are your bio kids. And the other 2 are whose?

I'm just trying to get a clearer picture.

Hang in there.