Thank you so much, Nrthman. I've certainly learned that depression is a lot more shouty and complex than just eating cake in your pjs in front of the tv!!

I think it is really tricky to work out how to deal with adult things like money, houses and legal stuff when someone is suffering from severe depression. They either avoid things or flip-flop around, and their brains seem to be a bit like cheese with holes.

Has your spouse been diagnosed and are they getting treatment? (Although tbh I think my H's psychiatrist has made some things worse and I'm not sure his ADs have helped the pitch much, just made him emotionally numb and fat with erection problems! Oh, ok, that last one is a plus for me if a minus for him and OW - LOL) Detaching and accepting you cannot fix their depression is tough but necessary.

Me: 53 H:38
T:20 M:14
BD ILYB etc 10/15, H diagnosed severe depression
S 1/16
PA 4/16
H filed 1/17