Keep hanging in there. She's figuring out that you're managing to stop making her the center of your world, and she doesn't seem to like it, does she? Stay quiet here. Keep detaching.
When she starts throwing crumbs your way, don't play her game. It'll be a temp check, not real, and if you bite, things will just go back to where they are now.
So I'm it's basic form; maintain NC/detachment/180 until either she gives me the papers next week like she said; or until she mentions something about the OM?
Just continue to work on myself as hard as it is to ignore her? It's taking every bone in my body and everything I learned on this site not to just talk to her about where I am at with my thoughts.
M:30 W:28 T:9 MR:2.5 NoKids Seperation 1: 9/16-12/16 Move back in: 1/17 BD: 8/15 She moved out: 9/1
As long as their is OM there is nothing to talk about. If she wants to drop the OM and work on the MR then you can talk but until then she gets nothing. She doesnt deserve to know your feelings. You have told her you don't want a D but if she wants to file you wont stand in her way. You have also told her there is nothing to discuss as long as there is OM. What more do you have to say? She is a big girl if she wants to file it is up to her.
If my W came to me and said she wanted a D I would do the same. Outside of not having sex for a bit I am doing great! I am sitting here on the coach drinking a beer in complete silence!!! After 16 years of having a W and kids in my ear I must admit it is quite nice .
Ok; I did not take the bait; but I might have backtracked. She called me 7 times from like 1-2am. I finally answered the last call and answered with a "are you ok; are you safe". She responded "yea....you haven't responded to my texts all nigh (in a very baby like low voice)t". I said again, "yea I know,I was sleeping; are you safe? (I was in a fog from just waking up). After she said yes again; I told her OK, I'm going to sleep goodnight and hung up.
I could tell she had been drinking a bit; I assume that is where those texts and calls can from.
I might have taken some bait there; but I also wanted to make sure she was ok...back to square one again...
M:30 W:28 T:9 MR:2.5 NoKids Seperation 1: 9/16-12/16 Move back in: 1/17 BD: 8/15 She moved out: 9/1
You are not back at square one. You did freaking awesome. You didn't answer any of her text and waiting a whole hour to answer her call. You asked was she alright. When she said yeah, you told her goodnight and hung up. That is awesome. You didn't get drug into a convo, you did what any natural human being would do. Make sure she is ok.
Great job. Keep up the hard work. She is getting curious. She might start to show a little desperation. Stay strong my friend.
M:37 W:37 T:11 M:10 S17, S13, S10, S4 BD:06/28/17 OM confirmed 07/20/17 Recon the M 10/29/17 Working hard:2gether
Onward and forward
This process is not a sprint it's a marathon! Patience, Patience, Patience.
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