Sounds like her business is priority No. 1 and there's a lot of stress at work. It's the worst when there's an emergency and you can't get online.
I can tell you as an entrepreneur, sometimes things come up when you least want them to... and the best thing my spouse can do is let me do what I need to do. Take the kids, read a book, take the dog for a walk, just let me be.
Can you get help around the house for the small things? I'm guessing that if work can get out of control, she is looking for something she can control...like messes in the house. That's the way my S operates, anyway.
