25yearsmlc - This is a woman's perspective that I really needed, thank you.
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the "sex feels like rape" is both disturbing and dramatic. (Was there abuse in her childhood?) However I relate to the childbirth making some sexual things different. A certain spot is no longer "fun" but it can be worked around.
No abuse that I know of from her childhood. She liked sex a lot before kids. She did slowly pull back - don't kiss me there, don't touch there, I don't get a lot of pleasure from sex but you do so I'm good with it, etc. We did experiment with toys that she got a lot of pleasure out of, but she kept feeling badly/ashamed that she didn't have the sensations without the toys.
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As for discussing divorce and her wanting one, what is stopping her?
I think she's waiting/wanting for me to do something. It's hard work and she doesn't really like that kind of emotional stress, better to let someone else do it. And, she's conflicted. She's really warm when she's not in blame rage.
I am seeing an IC for me, and the MC fired us...exactly what you said would happen. She kind of manipulated the MC.
