Definitely shouldn't have asked about the divorce party. I did a lot of similar comments in the beginning, I don't know why, but it shows pursuit and can lead to other unproductive reactions.
The milestones hurt: BD, separation, papers filed, final D; but I think the real timeline is the fog tunnel. That's what has to happen for any reconciliation to take place. Anything that happens in the fog has less meaning and permanence.
Kylo, I totally agree about the divorce party. I won't make that mistake again
Side note: I GAL'd tonight. I went out for drinks with a new person. She is an INTJ vs my INTP. I was completely comfortable with her from the get go. We had very intelligent discussions on a variety of topics. She is also finalizing her divorce. She showed me a great deal of respect mentally, physically, and emotionally. She respected my boundaries and made me feel completely at ease. Nothing physical happened at all, but it was great fun. Socializing is a hit in the pocketbook, but great for the spirit.
Married 9: Together 11 M:37 W:35 S:2 D:7 Bomb dropped 6/3/2017 W moved out 7/1/2017 Separation Filed: 8/1/2017 Modified to Divorce: 8/21/2017 Divorced: 10/5/2017