Finding my way out of the dark - Part 4

[Holding]

RECAP: BD in late April, 2017. Did some wrong things for about a month then started DB'ing for another month. W said she wanted a D on 7-13 and her L filed 4 days later. Since then, we've told the kids, and I've gone dark. Trying to save things has just gotten too painful for me.

I've accepted the D is coming, though I still have emotional moments that hit out of the blue. I've also realized that my W has used me and treated me like a doormat for pretty much our entire M. The hardest part is I allowed it to happen.

D is not what I wanted, but it's here and I have to face it. I'm trying to look forward to what my new life could be - an awesome single dad who could be a really great partner for someone new.