I have read a bunch of them, that's actually what prodded me
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to join these boards! The thing that's not making sense to me is that after she "asked for" a D at lunch this week - she asks a lot and I haven't ever consented, now I'm done talking about it - is that she bought furniture for our house later that day, we had a really nice weekend kayaking, eating out, listening to podcasts, and other "together" activities that she initiated. No sex but very pleasant. Why would a WW wife do that? Seems to me that if you've decided you're done, and verbalized it, you're really done. I'm really struggling with the mixed messages
I am sorry you will never figure it out. She is probably scared and confused as well. After my W told me she wanted a D the first time she asked me to take her out to eat. After the second time we went boating together then out to a pool party with some friends and she was kissing me. You will never make sense of it so don't even try.
You just have to start doing what everyone else has suggested, GALing, 180's etc. Detaching is the hardest, I am almost 3 months into my separation I am not even close to being 100% detached. Really the only thing I am good at is not pursuing or talking about our R or D.
