What I urge you to do is be very careful that you don't use your children as a crutch or excuse to not GAL, detach, and perhaps other advice about DBing.
The kids aren't a crutch to me GAL. Went over to a friend's house tonight for a drink (unusual for me), I take business trips, etc. but I admit that it hasn't been there enough in the past. I do plan to do more for me. That feels really good. Definitely doesn't injure the kids to have me a way for a while. W has always encouraged it too.
Originally Posted By: Sandi2
She needs to wonder where you are and what you're doing......and who you are doing it with. Let me guess.......when she contacts you and ask what you're doing........you spill your guts. Right?
Well we are still living together and sleeping in the same bedroom (except for when I'm snoring), and she's been really easy to live with this weekend, so yes, I have told her where I'm going. If we were separated, I'd act differently. I do like the idea of creating some intrigue, but "dad of the year" doesn't just disappear.
Originally Posted By: Sandi2
I have tried to shed light on the WW mindset in several threads........if you want to read them.
I have read a bunch of them, that's actually what prodded me to join these boards! The thing that's not making sense to me is that after she "asked for" a D at lunch this week - she asks a lot and I haven't ever consented, now I'm done talking about it - is that she bought furniture for our house later that day, we had a really nice weekend kayaking, eating out, listening to podcasts, and other "together" activities that she initiated. No sex but very pleasant. Why would a WW wife do that? Seems to me that if you've decided you're done, and verbalized it, you're really done. I'm really struggling with the mixed messages.
BTW I haven't given any ILY's this weekend, no physical touch initiated by me, just creating space. That's hard to do too.
