Boston Dad Need of Help Part 2

[Teppo]

Hi all,

It's been some time since I've posted here. I hope everyone is doing well.

My situation remains the same, unfortunately. Lately I've been having bad dreams about my W where I plead with her to stay and not leave me. I think I've actually cried in my sleep. I'm also dealing with bouts of depression. I've been taking a prescription for several months, but I feel that it doesn't work.

I'm still living with my W and the D is not final. My W hasn't come to me on when she wants to tell our son about her D plans. I tried to have a conversation with her about it, but it turned into an argument where she threw out her favorite phrase "Stop bullying me". I'm also waiting on this job that I applied for, which I think I have a high probability of getting. There's so much up in the air right now, it's hard to think straight.

I plan on joining a divorce recovery program this week called Divorce Care. Has anyone heard of it?

On the bright side, I've had to turn away a couple of women who I met through my Swing (that's Big Band music to you folks) dances. I must confess that it was exhilarating to feel wanted again, to have a woman ask me questions about my life, and who simply liked me. I got their phone numbers and for about a week enjoyed flirtatious bantering with them via text messages. I realized how addictive and exciting it was to do this and that this is how my W must've felt when she started her EA. I also realized how quickly this situation could've developed into a sexual affair. Knowing that, I can't believe that my W's EA has not developed into a PA.

I felt conflicted at first, but then I figured, my W is the who filed for D and told me that she doesn't want me - why should I keep myself from having fun? To be clear, there was no physical activity with either woman and I only met one outside of dancing for coffee. In the end, I cut off communication with both. What I learned through this little adventure is that there are a lot of women out there, so I feel encouraged about my future prospects. Is this taking detaching too far?

.