I need him to come by the house every day and be with the kids, as he gets out of work hours before I do and we don't want them to be home alone.
My suggestion would be to establish a boundary that as soon as you get home he leaves. Your goal should be to be around him as little as possible.
Better yet, set a time that he should leave and then don't come home until after that time (for awhile) so that he doesn't have any contact with you. He has to miss you before he will come back. As AnotherStander points out, read all the LBS threads in Cadet's links above.
Is it counterproductive to TELL him that I want that boundary or should I just enact it without saying a word? I think the latter sounds better
________________________ M: 35 H: 36 M: Together 16 years; M 6 S14, D12 BD: 8/11 H Moved Out: 8/13 PA confirmed: 9/2 H Back Home: 9/27 OW Says she's pregnant/R on hold: 10/12
