RR17, when a newcomer arrives on the board, s/he may not have the slightest clue about where they need to begin b/c most of them are dazed, confused and afraid. DB Members who are a little farther down the road, pluse Cadet's great paige of compiled resources will post various suggestion, and may say what worked best for them. It's not uncommon for a newcomer to get a little confused with all s/he is having to learn quickly.
Have you read the entire book of Divorce Remedy? Did you interpret some of the suggestions MWD gave for various examples of marital issues as never growing beyond the point to where you would have to continue using that tool throughout the rest of your life? Take for example the last resort tech (LRT). Applied during the pertinent time of the troubled MR......it can be very effective. But what if the couple reconciles? Would you advise them to use the LRT? I hope not.......b/c that was an application to use as the last straw, and if the couple is trying to reconcile, then they wouldn't use the LRT.
It's kind of that way with Sandi's rules, too. FWIW, I never named them. Someone else did and it stuck..........but they are not die hard rules, where you get kicked off the board for breaking one. And, they are not always applicable in ever stage of the MR, such as piecing.......just like DTR and LRT would not be applicable. Why? B/c they are simple guidelines, short bullet notes to help dazed & confused newcomers, who have probably been hit with the BD.......have something to put in their hands a list of Do's and Don't...........to give them some sense of direction.
On the other hand, if this does not describe what you are trying to relate in your sudden usage of one to three sentence posts lately.......then please spell it out for us. In the me
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
