New to the journey and thank you.

[Kylo]

After this I was looking at the credit card app, reviewing purchases and I see two out-to-eat purchases on the same day. I ask the W if this makes sense and she says she went to lunch, then later her friend (who is a loose cannon and has definitely influenced my wife for worse, who comes up with the idea to spend $300 on an in-town hotel, to buy cowboy boots for a country music concert that will never be worn again, etc.) has an hour to kill, so they go to get a drink. A bunch of teachers for the school where there, so they buy them a round of drinks. A wonderful sentiment if you have the money, really stupid if you don't. She started the story by saying it was funny, well maybe not if you're the guy paying for it...

So I go down the list and see $150 paid to the school. She tells me she made a donation to the schools fundraiser. This is double our normal contribution. She tells me as PTO president she has to give more. The other board members will see. Everyone else gives more. (this after yesterday my son comes home and tells me his friend gives $0) I tell her this isn't a smart move for someone in debt, and her way over the top volunteering can fill in for her monetary donation. She then comes back with "you donate to this children's charity, don't you care about the school?"

One trait I absolutely can not stand is worrying about money as it relates to social standing. She used to be with me on this, but now she can't handle being the poorest of her peers when we used to be the richest. My reaction was anger and just wanting her to GTFO. This trait makes me feel like I want to puke. I feel like this would have been a bigger blow-up, but we had been getting along.

Early in our marriage we completely cut off a couple we were friends with for this and how the other W always felt in competition with us.

This DB is so counterintuitive to who I am, I don't know if I can do it. If it wasn't for my faith, I really don't know what I would be doing.