When I mention depression and hormonal issues I list them after our marriage issues
Don't sell yourself short brother, those may very well BE your marriage issues. I am quite sure they were in my case, and my W was just a little older than yours at the time. My W went through menopause and that's when it all started. Your W is right there in that age range. Menopause affects some women very little and others in a big way.
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The fact that I myself checked out of marriage for a time. My porn viewing during that time something I do not do anymore.
Good gosh, you looked at PORN?????? Oh man, you must be a horrible human being! NO WONDER you're having marital problems! I heard a statistic once- 70% of men watch porn and the other 30% lie about it, LOL! I was listening to a sermon once, I think it was Chuck Swindoll and he said they had a group of seminary students in town for a seminar and he was one of the speakers. He asked them to anonymously answer a few questions beforehand, one of which was had they watched porn in the hotel while there at the religious retreat. I'm sure they felt they could be honest because if say 25% said yes then no one would know which said yes and which said no. Only problem was when they tallied it up it was.... 100% hahahaha! You can imagine the embarrassment, they thought they could hide behind statistics but every darned one of them was guilty My point being, we all look at some form of porn now and then, it's normal. Yes, even seminary students. People who beat themselves up or allow their wives to beat them up for it are just denying their own humanity. I'm not saying it's right and that everyone should do it, I'm just saying that we all do. It's too easily available to resist.
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My kids feel left behind also, my son seems to Be dealing better then my daughter the both are helping me and we have had long talks.
Awesome, you should absolutely be there to help them through this because your W probably won't be.
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I even offered to leave and have there mom come home.
NO NO NOOOOOOOO!!!!!! YOU need to stay home if you can afford to. I don't want to pick on anyone but there's a particular thread here now where the LBS moved out and his WAS invited OM right into the family home. So now she's there with OM and their kids, one big happy family, financially supported by the LBS. Talk about a sh** show.
My point being, we all look at some form of porn now and then, it's normal. Yes, even seminary students. People who beat themselves up or allow their wives to beat them up for it are just denying their own humanity. I'm not saying it's right and that everyone should do it, I'm just saying that we all do. It's too easily available to resist.