I'm loving your outlook and how you see so many positives
Originally Posted By: JujuB
Marriages work when you get two people that are just plainly committed regardless of unhappy times. The problem is you cant identify who the truly committed are until they have been put to the chance. The 50% of people that stay married just got lucky in that they married someone like. I think there are a lot of people out there with addiction issues and they do some pretty bad damage as well. I knew My ex was an addictive personality type. Cigarettes, Food. I never thought it could be an indicator of what ended up happening though. In the future that's what I am going to be weary of.
And I totally agree with this!
Looking back, I remember also making a *thinking* choice when it came to my H and M. I mean, he came from a very stable background, and was very stable himself. I didn't see any red flags. He certainly lived life full on, but it was in a very life affirming and positive way.
I still don't understand what happened. Intellectually, yes, perhaps...I can get my head round it. But emotionally? I still feel in the dark.
No matter, it is what it is, and now and the future is where I need to be focusing my energies.
Re the dating, it sounds like a great idea. It *really* boosted my self esteem. Just getting ready, feeling good about how I felt in my own skin and looked as well, going out, and having a nice few hours with someone.
Now, with some of the dates I went on, there was an instant 'no chemistry' thing, but the important thing was how I felt in myself, for myself. And from that perspective it was a really positive experience.
