Yes, that's such a difficult place to be. I held a memorial service for the man my exh used to be with one of my oldest and dearest friends (our maid of honor, actually). It was very healing for both of us as she was deeply hurt by his actions as well. It gave us each a chance to say goodbye to a person we loved who isn't really there right now and it helped me if not move on at least realize that this person is a different one.
Somehow I felt the need to separate the two so I could fully mourn the man I married and also fully realize with whom I'm currently co-parenting.
Frankly, I'm not sure they really have any clear thoughts about their future lives. They seem to all have a vision of what they think will happen in the vaguest of ways with zero notion of how it will come about. It's always struck me that story after story of the LBS shows how widely divergent from reality the MLC vision turns out to be and often how shocked the MLCr is when reality dawns on their foggy noggins.
Silence vs the spewer. Neither is easy to deal with. {{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}} to you Treasur. Best to focus on your own life at the moment and put this aside for now, whenever possible (like that's easy to do, not!).
What are your plans for the weekend? What will you do with this day to make you smile?
M 20+ T25+ S ~15.5 (BD) BD 4/6/15 D 12/23/16
"Someone I loved once gave me A box full of darkness. It took me years to understand, That this too, was a gift." ~ Mary Oliver
