Wives, especially young W's, are guilty of testing their H's. A woman needs her H to be stronger than she is. It's something born in us. If we are going to choose a man to give ourselves to, have father our children, trust him to lead and protect our family........he had better be a heck of lot stronger than we are.
This makes absolute sense to me as I am reading it. She has made emotional signs to this in the past (obvious I was not hearing her).
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Women will take unresolved issues and push down into their hearts. It turns into deep resentment. Imagine years of resentment packed down in a person's heart and how it would affect the MR.
Along with resentments come disrespect.
Well, this all affects her attraction and desire for you. Men can absolutely kill the attraction by being passive and leaving the decision making up to the W. She is designed in such a way that she has to respect her H as a man, in order to desire him.
It is like you have been traveling along side our relationship for the whole time. As I have developed and am reading information now that I am at my breaking point. This comment you just mentioned is so clear to me. I have noticed her desire begin to fade; as I was becoming more and more codependent and/or submissive.
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I suspect you have taken the back seat for a long time in your MR. You are a nice guy and think that by giving her the reigns in the MR she'll be happy. Her wants has come first, and you tell yourself that's the way it is in M. When she shows little signs of disrespect, you tell yourself it's no big deal.......and you suck it up and keep your mouth close. In the meantime, she is not interested in being intimate with you.
Yes; this all rings a bell to me. From my perspective; this has been her main complaint; the lack of intimacy, which I am begging to see it stems from the whole scenario you have laid out. She feel in love with me because who i WAS; she tested me, and I began to fail those tests...and failed and failed... she began her hurt, resentment, and starting building walls. I tried things to make it better (leaving little notes, giving more massages, etc.); but as we all know. Doing the same thing that isn't working will not turn to new results. Instead of leaving notes, and telling her I loved her; I should have taken charged in redeveloping my self-confidence and boundaries within our relationship. These are steps I am taking now by myself (180); which I should have to rebuild that intimacy, respect, affection, etc.
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I don't think you should attend the party.
Yes, agree. Before I saw this response, I did RSVP - No to her sister. I will be going to the Lake House with my buddies.
Do you think I should contact her on the day her dad passed?
