So it's been two weeks since h left on his vacation. And the time has flown. I have been taking so many classes and going out. I'm having a ball. I even got asked if a mutual friend of h and mine could set me up with one of his friends. I said no. I thought weird at first. Because he knows I was to reconcile with h. My friend thinks he was baiting me and temp feeling for h. I don't think h would do that. But he has been way nicer. I don't know if it's because I told him that I'm sick of this and that I don't want a divorce but if h really and truly does then let's take the next logical step and get this over with. Or if it's because I told h that I felt he didn't treat me like a friend and we needed to be at least polite to each other for the kids. Anyways. He has been very nice and polite and for that I am appreciative. Yesterday we were texting and he said something about work and I immediately said well I know you think I am letting things fall apart but I'm not. And he said I didn't say that. And I sat back and said you are right. You didn't say that. I was just reading into things. I'm sorry. And then we continued to talk for a bit. So I have no idea where things will take us when he gets back. But if it takes us to the lawyers to end this then I'm really ready for that. Sad. Very very sad. But I can't force him to be where he doesn't want to be.
