After consulting with my lawyer and lots of prayer, talking to family and friends and gut-wrenching soul searching, I fly to TN while my wife was on an out of town fishing trip with her uncle, gathered up my things and my sons things, and moved to CO.
Based on what you've been describing, I think that sounds like the wise thing to do.
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I'm currently living with my family here until I can get out from under some of the debt she placed me in
Have you talked to your L about the debt? If she's continuing to accrue debt which she MUST be since she doesn't have a job, you could be on the hook for part of it. Check with your L and see if there's a separation order or something that will protect you from her future debt.
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We finally reached a compromise where I flew him to her parents house, which is in a different state altogether, and she met us there and I offered for her to keep him as long as she wanted. I stayed also, but stayed with a friend and tried to minimize contact with my wife as much as possible.
I understand you're trying to be the nice guy here, but do you really think that was money well spent? Focus on YOU and your S, not her. Stay in CO, find a job, get your life together there.
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She got there, and right away I could tell she wasn't really wanting to be a mother to our son, but more a fun aunt. She slept in every morning and would text and call me every day to take him in the morning so she could sleep in (I didn't), she stayed up everynight until 2-3am talking to guys back in TN (this I heard from her parents) and she finally left after only spending 2 weeks with our son (she originally planned to spend a month there).
Take that as a lesson learned. Don't do that again. Your W is off the reservation, don't waste your time and money on trying to make her the good mom she isn't.
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So my son and I came back to CO and we are working on getting our lives together here.
Good.
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I'm currently waiting until I establish residency (which will happen in a few weeks) and praying about if I should file first to get the edge in the custody battle sure to ensure, or wait.
Discuss it with your L, he (or she) may have some suggestions on you documenting your W's behavior to use if there is a dispute over custody. If this woman is carrying on conversations with 15 guys, is jobless, is partying all night and sleeping half the day then I can't imagine you would want her to have ANY unsupervised custody. Frankly she sounds dangerous to your son, or even at best, a very bad influence.
